Do you hang out with law school friends after law school? Forum

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Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Tue May 08, 2018 6:25 pm

Hi, I'm a 3L about to graduate in a week or so. I'm wondering if people hung out with their law school friends post-graduation i.e while being an actual attorney? I'm lucky to have a group of friends in law school, but I feel I hang out with them mostly because we are in law school together, and spend so much time together rather than because of shared interests etc.

Now, with graduation coming, I'm not sure of how much I'll see them, even if we'll be working in the same city (NYC), simply because we won't be in that law school environment together. Is this normal-is it easy for attorneys to meet new people and make new friends in NYC?

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Wed May 09, 2018 12:42 am

I still talk daily (due to groupchat) with 3 of 8 "close" law school friends

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Wed May 09, 2018 9:26 am

Nope, not really at all. I see some of them still hang out on FB, but those tend to be the ones who went to NY after law school, so they're close together. Maybe if you go to a school where most of the class ends up in the same city. Post law school, people tend to focus on their careers and start serious LTR or families, all of which are death to casual friendships. Growing up sucks.

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Wed May 09, 2018 10:19 am

I had a great group of friends in law school and am actually closest with them now as compared to friends from high school, college, etc. Regularly talk (via groupchat like poster above) and hang out on weekends, etc. You have 3 years of shared experience with these friends that you don't have with your other friends and you are all working in the same profession so it makes sense that a lot of people remain close with friends from law school. I don't know your particular scenario, but if you are genuinely friends with these people I don't see why that wouldn't continue after law school.

toast and bananas

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by toast and bananas » Wed May 09, 2018 11:37 am

Yes but it takes more effort because everyone is busy and schedules rarely sync up. Group chats are a great way to maintain connection with minimal effort.

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Civilservant

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Civilservant » Thu May 10, 2018 8:16 am

Are you really asking a forum whether you should continue to be close friends with a group of people?

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by paperrev » Thu May 10, 2018 10:17 am

Civilservant wrote:Are you really asking a forum whether you should continue to be close friends with a group of people?
^This.

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Sun May 13, 2018 4:48 pm

i never liked the company of law students. the more distance i can keep from them, the better. there is a group chat that i'm in with more "closer" friends, but i speak the least. i was hoping the group chat would die but other people continued it. well, that was my thinking at the beginning. however, i realized over time that i'm talking more because keeping in contact with law school friends helps with networking and they can provide opportunities i would have otherwise missed.

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smokeylarue

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by smokeylarue » Mon May 14, 2018 4:46 am

Anonymous User wrote:i never liked the company of law students. the more distance i can keep from them, the better. there is a group chat that i'm in with more "closer" friends, but i speak the least. i was hoping the group chat would die but other people continued it. well, that was my thinking at the beginning. however, i realized over time that i'm talking more because keeping in contact with law school friends helps with networking and they can provide opportunities i would have otherwise missed.
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clarion

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by clarion » Tue May 15, 2018 3:25 pm

I work in the same city from and still see law school friends once a week. It worked out that it's a city we're not from and therefore don't have many pre-law school friends. But I'm government and so is that handful of friends, so we have predictable schedules that we can work around.

The others we're close to who went to top-of-the-line biglaw we only speak to/see infrequently. (Obviously). And our friends who moved away are basically nonexistent at this point. (We graduated a few years ago).

TLDR: yes, but only because we're in the same city and not in Biglaw.

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by TheoO » Tue May 15, 2018 4:27 pm

Many of them have become my closest friends. We get together all the time.

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Toni V

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Toni V » Sat May 19, 2018 11:57 pm

I’m working at a firm several hundred miles from my law school city... no one from my LS is working here. However, I’ve been to two out-of-state weddings; on three occasions I’ve had former LS cohorts spend a weekend with me; and I’ve traveled to my LS city to visit with friends who secured there. Hardly a week goes by that I don’t speak with a former LS friend. Aside from complaining about the grueling hours, most everyone is in good spirits.

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by anon4424 » Sun May 20, 2018 4:05 pm

I really wanted to reply to this thread because it's also something I've been wondering.

I found law students in general to be hyper-competitive, hyper judgmental and hot tempered. This is maybe also a reflection on myself. I've definitely moved 'cliques' a few times while in law school, and have had some fallings out, although for the most part they've been resolved. I keep in touch with a few of them but I know that numbers will continue to drop as I work.

My least favourite part of law school has been the feeling that even socializing within our community is work. I wish for the good old days where you could go for a beer and let loose with your undergraduate friends - but it seems, at least for me, that the legal community is constantly on watch and gossiping. I've found it difficult to find easy, non-competitive and kind people in the crowd. I couldn't care less who you're dating/hooking up with, fighting with or whatever is going on in your personal life - but it seems like everyone in law school sticks their nose in everyone else's business.

I've myself given this advice to younger students: try to play 'nice' to everyone, because you'll be working in a small environment where everyone knows everyone. However, the longer I spend in the legal community, the more I find it almost unbearable to get along with everyone. People have really big personalities here. Also, backstabbing is a thing; it's like people keep secrets as a way of keeping others in check. I've never really experienced this previously. I struggle trusting people when I know that they are only asking me for coffees because they want my job, not because they actually like me. I wish law students approached friendships as valued things other than job boosters, but it is definitely a trend I've noticed (and something that, admittedly, I have also kept in the back of my head).

My question piggybacking on this thread is: how important is it to keep friends/network with your law school class? :oops: Is it a strike against me forever if I only have three/four close friends - does this harm my potential in the future to retain fellow students as future clients? I'm sick of thinking of everyone as future networking leads; I'd rather just hang out with people that I like. But I also recognize that this is a small community (at least in my city - a large metropolis with a tight-knit legal network). I'm interested in advocacy based practices - not solicitor - if that helps anyone give guidance. At my firm, a partner told me that all of her clients are basically friends from her law school (who started in big firms but then moved in-house). How much is this true? I feel like I'm worried that I've already burned bridges so sometimes I'm a bit of a doormat with the friends I have - I often feel like I'd honestly rather be spending time with my non-law friends, but again, I'm worried about future issues retaining clients. I know this is a 5-10 year down the road question, but it's something that I feel is drilled in our heads from the day we start law school.

I wish I didn't have to ask this question, but it seems to be a reality in the world of intersecting business and law that friendships merge with client retention. How important is reputation in the scheme of things? Everyone seems to make such a deal out of it, and I agree that to a degree everyone needs to be professional. But some of the most successful partners are also clearly wildly unlikeable and give no fucks about the opinions of others. There seems to be a disconnect that I can't grasp. Can anyone speak to this?

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Re: Do you hang out with law school friends after law school?

Post by Anonymous User » Mon May 21, 2018 6:48 am

Yes. I made some close friends. Some of which I am still close friends with.

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