Rough draft/sample PS
Posted: Mon Feb 12, 2018 4:49 pm
Have a very poor GPA which I felt needed to be addressed head on. Extreme splitter. I have a few drafts of different approaches but would love some feedback on this one.
It's 4:55 am and I just finished reading One L by Scott Turow in one sitting, an account of his struggles through the first year of law school at Harvard. 300 stiff pages, turned one by one. A single phrase from those dusty pages resounded in my head: "meeting my enemy", a term he used to explain the hardships and less appealing parts of himself he battled. My head is spinning with an excitement I have not felt in a long time, goose bumps running down my forearms. I realized that most people don't meet their enemy until later in life.
According to Turow, first-year law students often face anxiety and discomfort, wondering how they will endure the hardships and self-discovery their enemy will force upon them. These experiences will shape them as a person, pushing them to decide whether a legal career is the right path for them. I close the book and lean back in my chair, with a smile on my face. I realize I am ahead of the curve, for I already met my enemy, made him my friend even. I am confident I will excel at law school and I cannot wait for the challenge.
There are two meaningful times when I met my enemy that have shaped me in a tremendous way. My senior year of high school, when I was faced with the ultimatum of either continuing life as the "fat funny kid" I had been for 18 years or taking matters into my own hands. I knew what I needed to do. My journey was grueling and took nearly 6 months. Finally, I had a new-found love for myself and knew what I am capable of. I was criticized and felt like I was going to fail numerous times, but still I persevered and learned that when I have a goal in mind, I do everything in my power to reach it. I am a new person, one who is confident and able to share ideas, interact with people and walk with pride. I lost 70 pounds and am down to a healthy 195.
The second, and most important encounter with my enemy, came midway through my junior year of college. I hit rock bottom and was going nowhere quickly. My dreams of law school and of creating a change in the world through legal activism seemed out of my reach. I was working full time, failing to balance my time adequately. I earned 6 F's in a span of 3 semesters and was on the verge of flunking out. My grandma, who was my best friend, passed away in that third semester, and I had a summer to decide my fate. One option was to run home with my tail tucked between my legs, avoiding the agony of actively failing. I refused. Instead, I took ownership of my mistakes and faced my enemy head-on. I decided I was going to do whatever it took to realize my true abilities. I have a unique intellect, a keen way of analyzing situations, and finding solutions to problems. My academic record the last few years did not reflect this, and I began to doubt myself. Instead of taking my last two semesters lightly with electives, I picked up two minors and challenged myself to be better. I also created and am currently managing an annual food drive that has fed over 1,000 people in 2 years. I want to be a better citizen and use my abilities to assist others in doing the same, even those who feel helpless.
My grades dramatically improved, and I finished my last two semesters proud of my accomplishments, not letting the past hinder me. I explored the worst parts of myself, building confidence through adversity and thriving in the face of it. I already met my enemy. He is not scary, nor is he going to deter me. I now realize I have enormous potential and can use it to help others, specifically through the legal system. I thank my enemy daily, and do not regret a single action of my rocky past, as these experiences have shaped me into a person I am proud of today. I pick up One L, placing it in an empty space on my shelf. I am now ready to write my own stories.
It's 4:55 am and I just finished reading One L by Scott Turow in one sitting, an account of his struggles through the first year of law school at Harvard. 300 stiff pages, turned one by one. A single phrase from those dusty pages resounded in my head: "meeting my enemy", a term he used to explain the hardships and less appealing parts of himself he battled. My head is spinning with an excitement I have not felt in a long time, goose bumps running down my forearms. I realized that most people don't meet their enemy until later in life.
According to Turow, first-year law students often face anxiety and discomfort, wondering how they will endure the hardships and self-discovery their enemy will force upon them. These experiences will shape them as a person, pushing them to decide whether a legal career is the right path for them. I close the book and lean back in my chair, with a smile on my face. I realize I am ahead of the curve, for I already met my enemy, made him my friend even. I am confident I will excel at law school and I cannot wait for the challenge.
There are two meaningful times when I met my enemy that have shaped me in a tremendous way. My senior year of high school, when I was faced with the ultimatum of either continuing life as the "fat funny kid" I had been for 18 years or taking matters into my own hands. I knew what I needed to do. My journey was grueling and took nearly 6 months. Finally, I had a new-found love for myself and knew what I am capable of. I was criticized and felt like I was going to fail numerous times, but still I persevered and learned that when I have a goal in mind, I do everything in my power to reach it. I am a new person, one who is confident and able to share ideas, interact with people and walk with pride. I lost 70 pounds and am down to a healthy 195.
The second, and most important encounter with my enemy, came midway through my junior year of college. I hit rock bottom and was going nowhere quickly. My dreams of law school and of creating a change in the world through legal activism seemed out of my reach. I was working full time, failing to balance my time adequately. I earned 6 F's in a span of 3 semesters and was on the verge of flunking out. My grandma, who was my best friend, passed away in that third semester, and I had a summer to decide my fate. One option was to run home with my tail tucked between my legs, avoiding the agony of actively failing. I refused. Instead, I took ownership of my mistakes and faced my enemy head-on. I decided I was going to do whatever it took to realize my true abilities. I have a unique intellect, a keen way of analyzing situations, and finding solutions to problems. My academic record the last few years did not reflect this, and I began to doubt myself. Instead of taking my last two semesters lightly with electives, I picked up two minors and challenged myself to be better. I also created and am currently managing an annual food drive that has fed over 1,000 people in 2 years. I want to be a better citizen and use my abilities to assist others in doing the same, even those who feel helpless.
My grades dramatically improved, and I finished my last two semesters proud of my accomplishments, not letting the past hinder me. I explored the worst parts of myself, building confidence through adversity and thriving in the face of it. I already met my enemy. He is not scary, nor is he going to deter me. I now realize I have enormous potential and can use it to help others, specifically through the legal system. I thank my enemy daily, and do not regret a single action of my rocky past, as these experiences have shaped me into a person I am proud of today. I pick up One L, placing it in an empty space on my shelf. I am now ready to write my own stories.