Personal Statement, Option 1 or 2

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HFV1028

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Joined: Mon Dec 18, 2017 3:56 pm

Personal Statement, Option 1 or 2

Postby HFV1028 » Mon Dec 18, 2017 4:03 pm

Hello,

I am applying this cycle for 2018 admissions. I'm having some difficulty deciding which of my two PS's is stronger. I would like to get across the point that my education in music has provided me a set of skills that can apply to a successful law school education.

Your help is greatly appreciated! All feedback is welcomed.

----- thank you!

___
V1
As the last notes of music died down, the audience was on its feet, applauding our performance of Camille Saint-Saens’ Violin Concerto in B minor. This would be my last performance with the Austin Philharmonic Orchestra and I was completely immersed in the moment. My life has been deeply rooted in music, as a concert pianist for twenty years, and now as the violin soloist for the Austin Philharmonic Orchestra. The opportunity to perform on this stage was the result of a mixed bag of attributes: potential, dedication, hard work, and the understanding of how to cope with an irreplaceable loss. For months I focused on the precision of my fingers as they danced up and down the fingerboard of my violin. I aimed to evoke my own musical style and to adapt when I reached those sections that were undeniably difficult. As I held my position and looked out towards the audience, I thought about how uncertain and chaotic the last year had been and I realized that I needed to treasure this moment of order and beauty.
Music and family have been the only true constants in my life. From a young age, I had a remarkable ability to play music and I can remember all too well the sounds of congas and cowbells resonating from inside of my grandmother’s house. Tita was music personified. She exuded passion, and her spirit and voice enveloped you and made you feel comforted in even the worst of times. But in the six months leading up to this performance my grandmother lost her year-long battle with cancer.
In uncertain times, I looked to Tita for support. She validated my passion for music and challenged me to always seek better opportunities. But all at once, I was numb. My devotion to music waned and in December of 2013, I slipped into a deep depression.
My path was completely uncertain. The loss of my grandmother translated into the loss of my own passion, my own will to perform, and the loss of myself. But it was in this moment that the Austin Philhamonic’s concerto competition gave me a chance to face my insecurities and celebrate my grandmother’s life. I wanted to prove that her passion for music still inspired me. This competition became more than just playing the violin. The three months of meticulous practicing proved to me that perseverance and hard work are the pathways to success. Tita used to say in Spanish, that “Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t want to work hard.” This is something that has revealed itself to me many times in my life but never so directly as it did after she passed away.
Tita’s passion for music continues to inspire me. Because of her, I have acquired a lifestyle built upon discipline and a focus on self-improvement. I see the importance of creating a foundation and devoting myself to learning and education. I have gained an appreciation for the subtleties and complexities of interpretation. I understand that to possess a passion and a personal interest in something, to believe in myself, is essential to my well-being. My decision to attend law school is shaped by these understandings.
A law school education is an opportunity for me to cultivate the characteristics upon which I have built my life. I want to focus on a discipline that stimulates my intellectual curiosity, and explore how the law creates order from chaos. I am interested in understanding how nuances in language affect legal contracts and how patterns in law are determined by interpretation. Most importantly, I want to dedicate myself to a study that pushes me to my limits, challenges me to achieve a greater purpose, and promotes the understanding that success is a privilege and it hinges on one’s dedication to persevere.
Those last few moments on stage with the Austin Philharmonic Orchestra often find their way back into my working memory. They serve as a reminder that with dedication, hard work, and a little bit of inspiration, I can achieve my goals. They assure me that an attention to detail and a focus on precision in life is an added benefit to my success. Those moments inspire me to promote my own self-improvement-- to welcome uncertainty and to pursue my passions.
My formal education with music ended many years ago, but my passion for music continues to shape how I live my life. The lessons from both music performance and my grandmother have provided me with the foundation to be successful and I will continue to focus on empowering myself to seek out new challenges. In this next phase of my life, I aim to build upon this foundation and succeed in law school with the same passion and flare that Tita instilled in me.

V2
As the last notes of music died down, the audience was on its feet, applauding our performance of Camille Saint-Saens’ Violin Concerto in B minor. This would be my last performance with the Austin Philharmonic Orchestra and I was completely immersed in the moment. The opportunity to perform on this stage was the result of a mixed bag of attributes: dedication, hard work, and the understanding of how to cope with an irreplaceable loss. For months I focused on the precision of my fingers as they danced up and down the fingerboard of my violin. I aimed to evoke my own musical style and to adapt when I reached those sections that were undeniably difficult. As I held my position and looked out towards the audience, I thought about how uncertain and chaotic the last year had been and I realized that I needed to treasure this moment of order and beauty.
Music and family have been the only true constants in my life. From a young age, I had a remarkable ability to play music and I can remember all too well the sounds of congas and cowbells resonating from inside of my grandmother’s house. Tita was music personified. She exuded passion, and her spirit and voice enveloped you and made you feel comforted. In uncertain times, I looked to Tita for support. She validated my passion for music and challenged me to always seek better opportunities.
In September of 2013, my grandmother lost her year-long battle with cancer. I found myself losing my own passion, my own will to perform, and the loss of myself. I began to search for something to bring back the spark that had always pushed me to persevere. It was in this moment that the Austin Philhamonic’s concerto competition gave me a chance to face my insecurities. This competition became more than just playing the violin. The three months of meticulous practicing proved to me that perseverance and hard work are the pathways to success; an understanding that has since spilled over into other areas of my life.
In the years since Tita’s death, I have been able to apply the lessons that she instilled in me throughout four years of successful of employment in legal services. In an effort to maintain the same level of precision and dedication that I displayed throughout my musical career, I have taken the time to hone in on the things that have made me successful in the past. I have acquired a lifestyle built upon discipline and a focus on self-improvement. I see the importance of creating a foundation and devoting myself to learning and education. I have gained an appreciation for the subtleties and complexities of interpretation. I understand that to possess a passion and a personal interest in something is essential to my well-being. I see now, that life can take a turn for the worst, and the way in which I encounter these challenges will promote my own success. My decision to attend law school is shaped by these understandings.
In submitting my application for admission to the University of Houston Law Center, it is my aim to bring these qualities to the incoming law school class. I have made a concerted effort towards pursuing the legal career path, and my experience in working with contracts has furthered my interest in pursuing a legal education.
A law school education is an opportunity for me to cultivate the characteristics upon which I have built my life. I want to focus on a discipline that stimulates my intellectual curiosity, and explore how the law creates order from chaos. I am interested in understanding how nuances in language affect legal contracts and how patterns in law are determined by interpretation. Most importantly, I want to dedicate myself to a study that pushes me to my limits, challenges me to achieve a greater purpose, and promotes the understanding that success is a privilege and it hinges on one’s dedication to persevere.
Those last few moments on stage with the Austin Philharmonic Orchestra often find their way back into my working memory. They serve as a reminder that with dedication, hard work, and a little bit of inspiration, I can achieve my goals. They assure me that an attention to detail and a focus on precision in life is an added benefit to my success. Those moments inspire me to promote my own self-improvement-- to welcome uncertainty and to pursue my passions.
My formal education with music ended many years ago, but my passion for music continues to shape how I live my life. The lessons from both music performance and my grandmother have provided me with the foundation to be successful and I will continue to focus on empowering myself to seek out new challenges. In this next phase of my life, I aim to build upon this foundation and succeed in law school with the same passion and flare that Tita instilled in me.

caic517

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Posts: 32
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 1:10 am

Re: Personal Statement, Option 1 or 2

Postby caic517 » Mon Dec 18, 2017 9:30 pm

PM'ed



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