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Would Greatly Appreciate A Critique Of My First Draft

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 8:05 pm
by Anonymous User
It definitely has a lot of problems - a bit meandering, cliches and platitudes, dead weight, etc.
Someone whom I trust has read and critiqued this and I agree with much of the criticism but I'd like to see a second opinion to see if the two critiques match up (or, to illuminate issues the other reviewer missed).

Re: Would Greatly Appreciate A Critique Of My First Draft

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:22 pm
by hermanberk
I'd be willing to read it -- feel free to message me.

Re: Would Greatly Appreciate A Critique Of My First Draft

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 9:49 pm
by Anonymous User
Thanks very much. I PM'd you