I'm going to take this down now that I've sent everything in. Thanks to everyone who helped me!

I wouldn't worry about the first mention of the police (in connection with your childhood), but I might remove the mention of the police as it relates to the "legal" battle you fought to get your job back. Unless you have a record that needs some 'splainin, there isn't really a reason to associate yourself with being on the wrong side of law enforcement.

I have a similar dilemma, and hope that maybe you might be willing to take a look at my post?

Thanks.

That sounds good, thanks.

I'll definitely take a look at yours!

hey man,

enjoyed your PS. I think it is a bit wordy, and though I don't think you should cut it down in terms of content, you should try to make it more concise.

I think you'll be fine with the police inclusion. It adds something to your motivation for wanting to be a lawyer.

And I raced and taught in Scots up north for about 6 years, and they sure as hell flip. oh baby. I just tell my students that they don't so they'll shut up for a bit